GLENN BECK PROGRAM
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GLENN: Anyway, I was watching it on Fox and they are running the little Frank Luntz meter thing where he gets all of these people in a room with a focus group and they turn the knob and then the ratings on how exactly -- you know, whether people like it or not -- hang on just a second. John, what are you doing? You're driving me out of my mind. I can't concentrate. I'm riddled with ADD. I can't do it. Do you need an adjustment on the microphone? Is that what you need? Okay.

I can hear you, John. I can hear you, for the love of Pete.

All right. So they had the little Peter on, you know, what the focus group thought, you know, of what everybody was saying and I have to tell you, Alan Keyes and Ron Paul, race to the bottom. It was unbelievable. It was the way to watch it because if you've ever watched these debates and you're like, jeez, that was really good or that was really bad; I wonder if anybody else is feeling this way. On a third of the screen was the ratings and how much people were like, oh, jeez, shut this guy up; or, I love that. And it was interesting to watch because you could see the key words. You could see. When anybody started talking about the border, which they really didn't talk about the border very much because I don't know, was this a high school journalism person that was asking the questions? The moderator was the worst.

STU: Yeah, she was getting hammered. They were saying, though, Glenn, that they weren't going to talk about Iraq or immigration because Iowa voters already had heard enough from the candidates about those things.

GLENN: Oh, okay. Good.

STU: That's the explanation on that one.

GLENN: Yeah, yeah. So we're going to ask about other things. Like here's my favorite: Raise your hand if you think global warming is a big threat. What, are we in the third grade? Raise your hand if you think global -- you know what? I've got to tell you. You know who scored big yesterday with me? Fred Thompson. You know, I've been watching Fred Thompson. I don't think that Fred Thompson is a dynamo by any stretch of the imagination, but yesterday was the Fred Thompson that I have been expecting to see and wanting to see. I don't know if it was just me. I know, I know, I know, I know: "Well, Glenn, he was on your show. Of course you like him now." Yeah, that's me, in a nutshell. I wasn't impressed with Fred Thompson even when he was on the radio show, and I told you that afterwards. Yesterday I was impressed with Fred Thompson.

Do we have the answer to the global warming question?

STU: Yes.

GLENN: Go ahead.

(Archive playing.)

VOICE: Is that yes or no for you? Do you believe that global climate change is a serious threat?

SENATOR THOMPSON: Do you want to give me a minute to answer that?

VOICE: No, I don't.

SENATOR THOMPSON: Then I'm not going to answer it.

GLENN: Do you believe global warming is a serious threat and caused by human activity? Yes or no? Oh, gee, hang on. Because there's no nuance in this answer at all. I mean, what is that?

STU: I actually read that the meters actually spiked higher than anything in the entire debate when he answered that question like that as far as the approval rating of that response.

GLENN: The two spikes in the show, that one, and the downward spike was Alan Keyes. Ooh. Alan Keyes gets all up in his Kermit the frog kind of impression and starts, "Well, let me tell you something, a lot of stuff being passed up here. It's not easy being green." And in fact, Dan?

DAN: Yes?

GLENN: Do we have any audio of Kermit the frog and audio of Alan Keyes?

DAN: I can find -- I can get some here.

GLENN: I just -- I mean, I can't take the man seriously.

STU: Yeah. Is that why he was included in the debate? Was it because it was a tip of the hat?

GLENN: I think Alan Keyes on that question should have raised his hand and said, it ain't easy being green. I think that's the way he should have answered the question.

STU: Why was he there, Glenn? He hasn't been in any of the other debates.

GLENN: Because if you're in Iowa, you can be in any of the debates as long as you have an office there.

STU: Yeah, but you have to be 1% of the polls, you have to have an office there and you have to just basically be an official candidate but then why isn't Kucinich in the Democratic one? Why isn't Gravel in the Democratic one?

GLENN: I don't have any idea. I don't have any idea, but it was a race to the bottom with him and Ron Paul. Ron Paul, every time Ron Paul and Alan Keyes spoke, if you were looking at those charts, and I'm sure that Fox News is part of the grand conspiracy. I know I've heard that everyone that works at Fox News on those ratings things, they're all part of a government conspiracy. They're all CIA agents (whispering.). but every time they started to talk, just race to the bottom. And by the way, I just want you to know, Ron Paul, Dr. Paul, is going to be on the program for a full hour Tuesday night television. Don't miss an hour of Ron Paul on television this coming Tuesday.

STU: This is big news, Glenn.

GLENN: Oh, I know.

STU: He's accepted your invitation.

GLENN: Yes.

STU: This is a huge development. You get a whole hour with him?

GLENN: Whole hour.

STU: Excited.

GLENN: Yeah. Now, they have requested that it is played in its entirety and not to edit it, which is hysterical because you should see the chain of e-mail after they wrote to me last night and said Ron Paul's going to be on the program, and I immediately wrote back and said, it must not be edited because I refuse to hear a single person say, "They edited it to make him look ridiculous!" Nope. Won't be edited at all and it will be a fair and open conversation with Ron Paul who, some of his supporters are great. Some of his supporters have been threatening my life, but we'll talk to Ron Paul about it on Tuesday, and it's sure going to be great.

Do we have the Kermit the frog and Alan Keyes?

STU: Yeah, looks like we do here, Glenn.

GLENN: Go ahead.

KEYES: What I think a lot of folks out there understand what you're watching in our country.

(It's not easy being green.)

GLENN: Okay, stop for a second. Go back to Alan Keyes.

KEYES: I don't know who you should vote for in the Iowa caucuses. Who represents the voice that they're absolutely determined to overlook in the discussion of our sovereignty and the betrayal of this people's sovereignty.

(It's not easy being green.)

GLENN: I'm telling you. I'm telling you.

KEYES: On the border, on our moral principles, on the major export overseas with --.

(It's not easy being green.)

KEYES: Is our jobs. These folks represent the very elites who year after year after year have destroyed our Constitution.

GLENN: You know what it is? You know what it is? It's Kermit the frog pissed off. That's what Alan Keyes is, a really pissed off Kermit the frog. It's like Kermit was -- it's not easy being green. It's, "It's not easy being green!" If you just imagine Kermit the frog really pissed off, you get Alan Keyes. Maybe it's just me, but I can't help it. Every time I see him I think... hi ho.

By the way, have you seen that Nancy Pelosi has spent $16,000 on flowers? $16,000 on flowers for her office because she had dignitaries coming in. By the way, Denny Hastert never spent any flowers for his office. She spent $16,000 in the last year. Do these people think we're made of money? Because by the way, that's your money. You've spent $16,000 on flowers, and she had them brought in -- hang on just a second -- for the dignitaries that she welcomed. She welcomed prime minister Ehud Olmert, she welcomed French president Sarkozy and Jordan's King Abdullah. $16,000. First of all, let me just point out I'm just think that Ehud Nicky and Abdullah could give a flying crap about flowers. I'm sure they all walked in and went, oh, my gosh, look at this, look at this bouquet; that is so welcoming; thank you so much.

Do you think these guys care? They're guys, for the love of Pete! What guy is saying, "Oh, my gosh. This is lovely." Do we really need to have flowers, $16,000 in flowers? When are these guys going to get it? When are these guys in Washington going to get it?

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