GLENN BECK PROGRAM
BEGIN TRANSCRIPT

GLENN: Oh, that is right, my friends. Welcome to the program. My name is -- my name is Glenn Beck. I am so glad that you're here. It is Closed Line Friday. Going to do a lot of phones today but first I wanted to start with a -- first I wanted to start with a test, see how many of these you can get right. Stu, Dan, this is our new immigration test. You've got to be able to answer these questions. Now, granted you have to -- you give the opportunity to study for this but how sad it really is that I bet a lot of these most people don't know. There's a couple in here I'm not really sure of. You ready?

Stu of the Stu Show Executive Producer of the Glenn Beck Program, TV contributor

Dan Andros Producer, Newsletter editor, overall great guy - you can just tell by smile

STU: Yes. This is where I look like an idiot and --

GLENN: No, I'll admit if I don't know it, I don't know it, either.

STU: This is like we're on now More-On Trivia is essentially --

GLENN: Yes, we are. Dan, you ready?

DAN: Yep.

GLENN: What are the colors of the flag? I know, I know.

STU: This is a real tough one. Red, white, and blue.

GLENN: Who was the first president?

STU: Washington.

GLENN: Dan, you can't get any help.

STU: And he slurred that word.

GLENN: What is the name of the President now?

DAN: Clinton.

GLENN: Going to give you a hint. He lied, they died.

STU: Oh, George W. Bush. Jeez.

GLENN: Thank you. What are the two parts of the U.S. congress?

STU: Senate and house.

GLENN: Name one branch or part of the government.

STU: Legislative.

GLENN: This is a tough one. How many amendments does the Constitution have?

STU: Let's see. I'm going to go -- I'm feeling twenty-two.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: How many?

GLENN: I was close. You know, my original was -- and I've been reading all this stuff on the founding fathers, too. No, 27.

STU: There's five in there we can get rid of honestly if we really look at it.

GLENN: 27, I love this, too. 27 is limiting congressional pay increases. Let's see. What do we call the first ten amendments?

STU: I would --

GLENN: Come on, you know this one.

STU: The Bill of Rights.

GLENN: Yes, thank you.

STU: Thank you.

GLENN: When was the Constitution written?

STU: Well, a long time ago, first of all.

GLENN: I know.

STU: We know that.

GLENN: I've got to look this one up. I'm not sure.

STU: I think it was 1781.

GLENN: 1781? I thought it was -- I think it was like 1788, 1787. 87? Adam says 87.

DAN: I have no idea.

STU: Well, I can look it up.

GLENN: All right, all right. I'm going with 87.

DAN: 1981.

GLENN: 1981. Dan is going with 81. Pretty sure you're wrong on that one. When -- let's see. Name one U.S. territory. Virgin Islands.

STU: Yeah, Virgin Islands.

GLENN: That's where we breed martyrs, right?

STU: No, I think you are thinking of a different situation.

Could You Pass The Test?

It was only appropriate to start Moron Trivia Friday by having Glenn, Stu and Dan take the new immigration test. Think it's easy? See if you deserve to be a citizen---take the test.

GLENN: Why did the colonists fight the British?

STU: Well, many reasons.

DAN: Tea.

STU: Religious freedom perhaps?

GLENN: No, it wasn't religious freedom.

STU: Why not?

GLENN: It wasn't religious freedom. It was tea.

STU: Oh, sorry.

GLENN: It was taxation without representation.

STU: Certainly I think that's one of the two.

GLENN: It was many -- that's the one where we argue with the teacher: It was many.

STU: That's kind of an open ended thing. I'm sure some Americans fought for some things and some for others.

GLENN: They said we keep asking you for stuff and you keep hammering us.

STU: Yeah, but it's more than that. It's religious freedom I think, too. You are telling me that there's no aspect of religious freedom in the creation of our --

GLENN: This is great. This is what all of us did in high school, all the way through. Every time we would argue. We would be one point away from that B or that A and we would be like, come on, man! There are many -- of course it was taxation without representation! But there were many aspects to it.

STU: Change the letters to C and D and I completely relate.

GLENN: And you're done. Who is the chief justice of the United States?

STU: Roberts, John Roberts.

GLENN: Oral Roberts is exactly right. Who was President during World War I?

STU: World War I, you are going, that's -- oh, jeez. This is --

DAN: Grover Cleveland.

STU: Wilson?

GLENN: Wasn't it Wilson?

STU: Wilson?

GLENN: Let's look that one up.

STU: Question mark?

GLENN: Look that one up and look the date of the Constitution up when we get to the end. What did Susan B. Anthony do?

STU: She made a dollar.

GLENN: No. That was Sacagawea. I love her and her orchestra.

STU: She is a great one. I don't even know what Sacagawea did.

GLENN: Or was that Pocahontas? Come on, Susan B. Anthony, what did she do? Flag? That was Betsy Ross. Susan B. Anthony, stop stalling, what did she do?

DAN: She's a singer.

GLENN: You are thinking Susan Anton.

DAN: Oh. Is Susan Anton mentioned in the Declaration of Independence?

GLENN: No, she's not, not in the immigration thing. Better look it up. Something, I think she --

STU: Oh, you don't know, either. That was so Alex Trebek of you. You acted like you were so smart and you knew and you have no idea, either.

GLENN: I think it's women's suffrage or the abortion. I think she either led women's rights -- no, come on. Who was the Planned Parenthood check? What was her name?

STU: That's not Susan B. Anthony.

GLENN: I don't mean the current one. I mean the one that started it all.

STU: They didn't give a dollar to --

GLENN: No, no, no, no. No, who is the woman that started the big women's civil rights? And I don't mean now. I mean like in the late 1800s or early 1900s. I'm not really sure. How horrible is this. But it may have -- that may be the one and the same. She started women's votes but she was also the icon for the women's movement.

STU: William -- women's suffrage, yes, that's her claim to fame.

GLENN: Check and see if she's also the one that was, like, big in -- just Google abortion chick.

DAN: Abortion chick. You're going to get some interesting results on that one.

GLENN: Does somebody know what I'm talking about? There was some woman, and it may be Susan B. Anthony, that was instrumental -- can't be Susan B. Anthony because too much later. I think it may have been in the tens or the 20s of the 20th century. You know, like women's reproductive rights.

STU: No, she died in 1906.

GLENN: I'm going to still say she was the abortion chick. I'm not sure.

STU: I don't know. It just doesn't feel like we gave a dollar to the abortion chick quote/unquote. I don't remember that but it's not impossible.

GLENN: She didn't say, hey, you got a right to abort that kid. She didn't say that but she was instrumental in the -- who was the lady who started Planned Parenthood? She wasn't --

STU: I can look that up.

GLENN: When did Planned Parenthood start? I know Susan B. Anthony didn't start Planned Parenthood but I think the woman -- there was some woman who was instrumental, was the inspiration.

STU: Margaret Sanger? Mary Ware Dennett?

GLENN: No. Margaret Sanger, look who she was inspired by. Does it say anything in Planned Parenthood about Susan B. Anthony or any of these chicks that, you know, led the suffrage movement? And I mean -- no, no, I mean the chick part, I mean with real respect.

STU: I'm going to say I don't see that here but it's not impossible, Glenn.

GLENN: It's not impossible. It's kind of like, what? There were other reasons besides taxation.

STU: Yeah. I think that's true. We were talking -- argue the religious freedom thing all the way to the end. Church of England, you know.

GLENN: Stu, you're right. We're both right.

STU: I mean, you know.

GLENN: What did Martin Luther King do?

STU: Civil rights movement. He was a walker. He walked a lot.

GLENN: I don't know if we could give you he was a walker. I think he was the first guy who did, like, the 10k walk.

STU: The man did a lot of things, though. You can't just limit it to he walked.

GLENN: He did do a lot of things again, you're right.

STU: He's a Reverend.

GLENN: He was a Reverend.

STU: Would you be right?

GLENN: I don't think so. I don't think that was the main point of his life.

DAN: Well, that's not what you asked. You asked what he did. Yeah, raised kids.

STU: You know what, who are you to judge what the main point of his life was.

DAN: He breathed. Yes, he did. He was a human being.

GLENN: He was a human being. He lived. That's what he did. What ocean is on the East Coast of the United States? Oh, I know this one.

DAN: Arctic.

STU: Ocean 13.

DAN: No, 11, 11.

GLENN: Ocean 13 is what we were looking for. How old do citizens have to be to vote for President?

STU: 18, months.

DAN: 13 in California, though.

STU: That's a different law, Dan, and it's a little disturbing that you know exactly how old that is.

DAN: The list of punishments.

GLENN: What did the emancipation proclamation do?

STU: That gave -- well, that was another civil rights situation.

GLENN: What are the two major political parties of the United States?

STU: Libertarian and peace and freedom party.

DAN: Dumb and dumber.

GLENN: You are exactly -- dumb and dumber is what we were looking for. Okay, all right. So it's Closed Line Friday. Let's go to --

STU: Wait, am I an immigrant or what? Am I a citizen?

GLENN: You have to get 80, what is it, 80 -- no, you have to get 92% to pass.

STU: I don't know if I got 92%.

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